Curtis and I are currently experiencing the hardest time of our lives. Last Thursday we lost the little girl who we were hoping would be born in September. We know that there are a lot of people who we should, but haven't talked to personally. We are hoping that this is a way we can share our story with fewer tears.
About a week and a half ago on Tuesday we were called into the doctor's office. We went in for an ultrasound and our doctor showed us some physical abnormalities that Addie had. We were really nervous and not really sure how optimistic to be. He sent us to a specialist in St. George on Thursday. The specialist pointed out a few more things that made us really nervous. He took some amniotic fluid and sent it off to be tested for chromosomal abnormalities. We were told that we would have to wait about two weeks for the results.
On Monday, (four days later) I came home for lunch. I was laying on the couch and feeling baby kick. It's something that I've only enjoyed that last couple of weeks. At that time, I got a surprising call. It was my doctor. He told me that the test results had come back and that our baby did have what is called Trisomy 18. This is where the 18th chromosome has three copies of the chromosome instead of two and this problem is not compatible with life. At this point, we had to accept that our little girl wouldn't live long, if we were lucky enough to see her alive at all. We were told that because I had so much fluid and was measuring full term that even though I had seven weeks left I would probably have the baby early. We estimated that we had about three weeks to plan and prepare for what was about to come.
I came home from work on Wednesday and started to time some contractions that were getting closer and closer together. I didn't believe it at the time, but I was in fact going into labor. By 12:15 Thursday morning, we were holding our beautiful baby girl. She was 2 lbs 3 oz, 14 inches long. Unfortunately, she wasn't born alive. We were, however, able to hold her and say goodbye.
We decided to have a small graveside service and buried her here in Cedar City on Friday afternoon.
Curtis and I have been completely amazed at how much support and love we have felt from everyone around us. We truly have witnessed so many selfless sacrifices from others, and out of this trial we have felt the love of our Heavenly Father.
It is strange to be a parent for a child that is not here with us physically. While we know we have become a mom and a dad in every sense of the word we find that with just the two of us that all of the changes we expected to experience have been delayed.
